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WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a break from a long-standing tradition, the White House announced that this year's Thanksgiving turkey would not receive a ceremonial pardon from President Joe Biden after it was discovered that the turkey had attended the riot at the U.S. Capitol on January 6, 2021.

"The turkey we had chosen for the occasion has been determined to be completely undeserving of a pardon," said White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre in a media briefing. "The President was very eager to bestow a pardon, but unfortunately, it came to our attention that this turkey participated in the violent attack on the Capitol that attempted to overthrow the government and destroy democracy itself."

The turkey has been returned to police custody.

The Biden administration learned of the scandal after it was presented with photos of the foul fowl wearing a red "Make America Great Again" baseball cap among other Trump supporters and undercover federal agents planted surreptitiously throughout the crowd on the day of the riot. Though other witnesses vehemently argued that the turkey had valiantly attempted to prevent agitators from vandalizing the Capitol and breaching its doors, security camera footage of the MAGA turkey wandering the halls and gobbling in House Speaker Nancy Pelosi's office was considered particularly damning.

"Listen, these dangerous ultra-MAGA birds are a serious threat to our nation, folks," President Biden said in brief remarks about the situation. "They must be dealt with and put in their rightful place, which is on my dinner table. End of speech. Walk away from podium."

At publishing time, all requests made to interview the turkey had been denied. It was reported that the bird was placed in solitary confinement at an undisclosed location as it awaited its execution, brining, and deep-frying without due process.

Whoever shot the Kingsland, AR water tower is a good shot.

Looks like the silhouette of Johnny Cash has got to go!

Yeah, the scammers on here accidentally come up with some classics.

About a year ago, one told me that she? couldn't arrive in my country because her mother needed an operation on her testicles.

Well today, I got a lovely invitation to communicate on whatthehellisup (or something similar) from a cute blonde woman (supposedly) in California who has a PhD in....... plumbing.
She must be able to change the heck out of an O ring and REALLY know how to unplug a toilet.
Even finding a university that specializes in such a field of study at the graduate level, must have
been quite an accomplishment.
Kudos to her

Have a terrific one !

WASHINGTON, D.C.—After over a year of courtship, Fox News correspondent Peter Doocy and White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki have announced they are finally tying the knot.

"Um, on a personal note, I would like to announce that I will soon be stepping down to marry Peter Doocy," said Psaki at the end of a recent press conference. "I believe, and the President agrees, that this is the best course of action for me at this point in time."

Doocy then jumped up from his seat in the press pool and then did a fist pump before aggressively questioning the Press Secretary. "Excuse me," he said, "don't you think it's a little hypocritical to host a lavish wedding ceremony to me in D.C. when so many people are struggling? And don't you think it's a conflict of interest to marry someone in the press?"

"No further questions," said Psaki with a twinkle in her eye and a shy smile before exiting the stage.

"Ugh, finally," said CNN correspondent Kaitlan Collins. "The crackling tension whenever those two were in the room together was overpowering. It makes it really hard for the rest of us to do our jobs when those two are bickering so adorably and making eyes at each other constantly. Get a room, you two! Also, Congratulations."

Doocy and Psaki will host a lavish wedding in the nation's capital, where all VIPs on the Left and the Right except for Lauren Boebert will be invited to attend.

The profile reads she's looking for an honest man, no lies. Her photo shows a woman medium height and a guesstimated weight of 145 to 150 pounds. Slim/Slender is her body type selection.
The thought through my head is she's lying or her perception is skewed.





A friend once told me he met a girl who was a "10" I was afraid to ask on which scale he graded her!

Effective immediately, all bloggers and commenters have to show proof they are fully vaccinated.

In other news it was revealed that vaccines killed the dinosaurs and that
Pepe LePew was a feline molester.

Video not for the squeemish

Told my kids I never want to live in a vegative state
So they unplugged my computer and threw out my wine.

I originally became exposed to this song, when I was a little kid watching The Little Rascals.
There was one episode called 'Pinch Singer'. In it Alfala sang a tune (off-key).

It was 'I'm in the mood for love', (originally written by Jimmy McHugh & saxophonist James Moody).



Of course since then, I've heard a number of people sing the song,
including Sara Vaughn, Nat King Cole, Sam Cooke, Frank Sinatra, Barbara Streisand, Rod Stewart, Peaches & Herb, and many others.

It's also been used as a jazz standard to innovate with, most notably by the great alto saxophonist Charlie Parker;



and piano great Art Tatum;



But, you know the lyrics, or at least the beginning.

"I'm in the mood for love, simply because you're near me."

Wonderful. But, this is 2021 and perhaps it's time for an update more in tune (pun intended)
with the current century.

So, starting with the opening, "I'm in the mood for love, simply because"........

lets have fun adding our own suggestions to update the tune.

To get us started I'll suggest;

I'm in the mood for love simply because....... of Viagra.

or ....simply because.... quarantine ended.

or .....simply because .... of your D cups.

or.............. add your own suggestions, if you like.