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I say to myself as I cripple to the cupboard to get some Advil and a glass of water

An Arizona Highway Patrol officer stops a Harley for traveling faster than the posted speed limit, so he asks the biker his name.

'Fred,' he replies.

'Fred what?' the officer asks.

'Just Fred,' the man responds.

The officer is in a good mood, thinks he might just give the biker a break, and write him out a warning instead of a ticket. The officer then presses him for the last name.

The man tells him that he used to have a last name but lost it.

The officer thinks that he has a nut case on his hands but plays along with it. 'Tell me, Fred, how did you lose your last name?'

The biker replies, 'It's a long story, so stay with me.' I was born Fred Johnson. I studied hard and got good grades. When I got older, I realized that I wanted to be a doctor. I went through college, medical school, internship, residency, and finally got my degree, so I was Fred Johnson, MD. After a while I got bored being a doctor, so I decided to go back to school. Dentistry was my dream! Got all the way through School, got my degree, so then I was Fred Johnson, MD, DDS. Got bored doing dentistry, so I started fooling around with my assistant and she gave me VD, so now I was Fred Johnson, MD, DDS, with VD.

Well, the ADA found out about the VD, so they took away my DDS. Then I was Fred Johnson, MD, with VD. Then the AMA found out about the ADA taking away my DDS because of the VD, so they took away my MD leaving me as Fred Johnson with VD. Then the VD took away my Johnson, so now I am Just Fred.'

The officer walked away in tears, laughing.

for gods sake ,what is wrong with people ,,stop crying because things did not go your way,
man up and deal with it ,
instead of behaving like spoilt kids and throwing your toys out of the pram,
what will be will be ,,,end of,,,

Well, we may not have has much to be thankful for so far in 2020.
But, I have a good feeling, that a LOT of people will be saying "Thank God !!" in a few days.

In a former life, I was a member of a site that had chat rooms, private chat, blogs and forums. On a busy Saturday night you could find over 2,000 people logged in, using the system.
One feature they had was to allow members to add comments to other members photos. Usually it was funny or nice comments. Scammers would often post email contact information for others to to get back to them.

One guy named Chotty could be found on every new profile tagging his words to every female in the system. He was famous. Often, it was mentioned when Chotty commented to a bloggers profile and often brought up in a blog. If I recall he was from the 'Deep South' maybe in Georgia or Louisiana. Chotty didn't blog and he didn't post in the forums. His thing in life was tagging photos.

With so many comments, his favorite line was:
"You've got a bangin' booty babygirl!"

I'm not sure how a face photo determined she had a banging booty... but he said it anyway.

Get ready America. Democrats complained about the Trump administration. This has been going on for 4 years. That was nutthin'
If there are 'world-class' whiners, it's the Republicans. No one can come close to the amount of whining they can do. They've already started...
So, batten down the hatches!
Whining... the likes of which the world has never seen before.

New Mercedes AA all electric car that runs on 9648 AA batteries.

Who the hell is GRAHAM?
Well Graham is the geezer who got home late one night and Helen his wife, says. "Where the hell have you been?"
Graham replies. "I was getting a tattoo!"
"A tattoo?" She frowned. "What kind of tattoo did you get?"
"I got a hundred dollar note on my privates." He said proudly.
"What the hell were you thinking?" She said, shaking her head in disgust. "Why on earth would a Chartered Accountant get a hundred dollar note tattooed on his privates?"
"Well, one, I like to watch my money grow.
Two, once in a while I like to play with my money.
Three, I like how money feels in my hand.
And, lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred dollars anytime you want."
Graham is now in The Critical Care Unit, Room 233. No visitors until further notice...............