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POLITICALLY CORRECT CHRISTMAS©
'Twas the night before Christmas and all was not still.
Jingler's rang; car'lers sang ‘Oh, To Men Of Good Will.’
But inside the courthouse, the defendant sat grim,
Took off his fur cap, stroked his chinny chin chin.
He stood 'fore the Judge, a frown creasing his face,
While his Lawyer proceeded to present his case.
"Your Honor", he pleaded, "this man's not a crook.
All he did was his job, which he did by the book."
The Judge glared from the bench, glasses tipped low.
"That's not quite the truth, I have his M.O.
Mister Clause is now in my jurisdiction,
And if I have a say, I'll yea for conviction."
"A quack we have here, in red masquerade,
With a sack filled with toys to complete the charade.
This man has ignored town noise ordinance,
So don't try to plead his law ignorance."
"His list of crimes go on; more than just a few.
Breaking and entering, everyone wants to sue.
Sneaking down chimneys is as bad as it gets.
Though child hanky-panky is worse even yet."
"Please explain the mistletoe, if perchance you can?
What about the orgy, started by this fat man."
The lawyer stepped forward, a tear 'pon his cheek,
"Please, your honor," said he, "please now may I speak?"
"Yes, my client was there, and the tale went like this,
The Missus grabbed his butt, and gave him one big kiss.
A gentleman he was, and kissed her back polite
So if it wasn't right, it was just an oversight."
'Twas the night before Christmas and all was not still.
Jingler's rang; car'lers sang ‘Oh, To Men Of Good Will.’
But inside the courthouse, the defendant sat grim,
Took off his fur cap, stroked his chinny chin chin.
He stood 'fore the Judge, a frown creasing his face,
While his Lawyer proceeded to present his case.
"Your Honor", he pleaded, "this man's not a crook.
All he did was his job, which he did by the book."
The Judge glared from the bench, glasses tipped low.
"That's not quite the truth, I have his M.O.
Mister Clause is now in my jurisdiction,
And if I have a say, I'll yea for conviction."
"A quack we have here, in red masquerade,
With a sack filled with toys to complete the charade.
This man has ignored town noise ordinance,
So don't try to plead his law ignorance."
"His list of crimes go on; more than just a few.
Breaking and entering, everyone wants to sue.
Sneaking down chimneys is as bad as it gets.
Though child hanky-panky is worse even yet."
"Please explain the mistletoe, if perchance you can?
What about the orgy, started by this fat man."
The lawyer stepped forward, a tear 'pon his cheek,
"Please, your honor," said he, "please now may I speak?"
Jingler's rang; car'lers sang ‘Oh, To Men Of Good Will.’
But inside the courthouse, the defendant sat grim,
Took off his fur cap, stroked his chinny chin chin.
He stood 'fore the Judge, a frown creasing his face,
While his Lawyer proceeded to present his case.
"Your Honor", he pleaded, "this man's not a crook.
All he did was his job, which he did by the book."
The Judge glared from the bench, glasses tipped low.
"That's not quite the truth, I have his M.O.
Mister Clause is now in my jurisdiction,
And if I have a say, I'll yea for conviction."
"A quack we have here, in red masquerade,
With a sack filled with toys to complete the charade.
This man has ignored town noise ordinance,
So don't try to plead his law ignorance."
"His list of crimes go on; more than just a few.
Breaking and entering, everyone wants to sue.
Sneaking down chimneys is as bad as it gets.
Though child hanky-panky is worse even yet."
"Please explain the mistletoe, if perchance you can?
What about the orgy, started by this fat man."
The lawyer stepped forward, a tear 'pon his cheek,
"Please, your honor," said he, "please now may I speak?"
"Yes, my client was there, and the tale went like this,
The Missus grabbed his butt, and gave him one big kiss.
A gentleman he was, and kissed her back polite
So if it wasn't right, it was just an oversight."
'Twas the night before Christmas and all was not still.
Jingler's rang; car'lers sang ‘Oh, To Men Of Good Will.’
But inside the courthouse, the defendant sat grim,
Took off his fur cap, stroked his chinny chin chin.
He stood 'fore the Judge, a frown creasing his face,
While his Lawyer proceeded to present his case.
"Your Honor", he pleaded, "this man's not a crook.
All he did was his job, which he did by the book."
The Judge glared from the bench, glasses tipped low.
"That's not quite the truth, I have his M.O.
Mister Clause is now in my jurisdiction,
And if I have a say, I'll yea for conviction."
"A quack we have here, in red masquerade,
With a sack filled with toys to complete the charade.
This man has ignored town noise ordinance,
So don't try to plead his law ignorance."
"His list of crimes go on; more than just a few.
Breaking and entering, everyone wants to sue.
Sneaking down chimneys is as bad as it gets.
Though child hanky-panky is worse even yet."
"Please explain the mistletoe, if perchance you can?
What about the orgy, started by this fat man."
The lawyer stepped forward, a tear 'pon his cheek,
"Please, your honor," said he, "please now may I speak?"
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jul 2014
About this poem:
i wrote it when I was angry when we were supposed to say, Happy Holiday in stead of Merry Christmas.POLITICALLY CORRECT CHRISTMAS© Part TWO
"Yes, my client was there, and the tale went like this,
The Missus grabbed his butt, and gave him one big kiss.
A gentleman he was, and kissed her back polite
So if it wasn't right, it was just an oversight."
"He's innocent, I swear, there was no lewd intent.
He's a friendly guy and the Missus looked content.
Now, about the eggnog, he only took two sips,
Not a drop of hard stuff ever touched his lips.”
The old Judge looked stern and rubbed his craggy jaw.
"That may be true you say, but he broke another law.
He didn't knock on doors, but down the chimney came,
That's a crime in any court, this I do proclaim."
"And lest we not forget the damage done to roofs,
Is caused by sixteen pair of dancing reindeer hoofs.
Does he have a license for such a prancing team?
Does not this mode of travel seem to everyone extreme?"
“And for his ‘Ho, ho, ho’s,’ it's nothing we should hear,
It has another meaning, and that meaning's all too clear.
The man should be discreet, use words that don’t offend
We can’t be too careful in the message that we send.”
"And it says he sits the children high upon his knee.
Without a doubt, this reeks of suspicious stuff to me.
No one in his right mind would parade in that disguise.
It's dirty old men like him that decent folk despise."
"And this complaint about his work shop,
Where little ones slave all round the clock,
No coffee breaks, I say there's no excuse.
His continuing labor-law abuse."
And let’s touch on a subject, that’s in the news today
That tho your elves seem jolly, they don’t seem to be gay
And I’m sure you will agree, it has to do with sex.
When one guy likes another; that has to be complex
"With Equal Opportunity, he's hit a brand new height.
All employees are wasps, what’s more, they’re blond and white.
Not one older woman, or black Hispanic male.
I see no way to keep your client out of jail."
"Please, kind Sir," said Santa, "I'd like a chance to speak.
I do not think ‘tis fair that you call me a freak.
Most kids have gone so far to calling me a saint,
But even I admit that that's a bit too quaint."
"Truth is I'm not more than a poor delivery man,
Trying to bring joy where ere I always can.
Through sleet and snow and slush and rain,
Not once have I been heard complain."
"But if it please the court, I swear
I'll change my ways, though it's unfair.
I promise to be lawful, knock on every door,
Won't slide down the chimney or land upon the floor."
"I won't kiss the Missus, just shake her hand instead.
Little kids can stand and I'll pat them on the head.
The cookies and eggnog, I'll leave for other guests.
My elves will work in shifts, with many, many rests.
"As for my hiring habits, tell you what I'll do.
I'll hire a Cuban black and a Catholic and Jew.
The deer will go to pasture; I'll put away the sleigh,
Deliv'ry in corporate trucks will route me on my way.
The Missus grabbed his butt, and gave him one big kiss.
A gentleman he was, and kissed her back polite
So if it wasn't right, it was just an oversight."
"He's innocent, I swear, there was no lewd intent.
He's a friendly guy and the Missus looked content.
Now, about the eggnog, he only took two sips,
Not a drop of hard stuff ever touched his lips.”
The old Judge looked stern and rubbed his craggy jaw.
"That may be true you say, but he broke another law.
He didn't knock on doors, but down the chimney came,
That's a crime in any court, this I do proclaim."
"And lest we not forget the damage done to roofs,
Is caused by sixteen pair of dancing reindeer hoofs.
Does he have a license for such a prancing team?
Does not this mode of travel seem to everyone extreme?"
“And for his ‘Ho, ho, ho’s,’ it's nothing we should hear,
It has another meaning, and that meaning's all too clear.
The man should be discreet, use words that don’t offend
We can’t be too careful in the message that we send.”
"And it says he sits the children high upon his knee.
Without a doubt, this reeks of suspicious stuff to me.
No one in his right mind would parade in that disguise.
It's dirty old men like him that decent folk despise."
"And this complaint about his work shop,
Where little ones slave all round the clock,
No coffee breaks, I say there's no excuse.
His continuing labor-law abuse."
And let’s touch on a subject, that’s in the news today
That tho your elves seem jolly, they don’t seem to be gay
And I’m sure you will agree, it has to do with sex.
When one guy likes another; that has to be complex
"With Equal Opportunity, he's hit a brand new height.
All employees are wasps, what’s more, they’re blond and white.
Not one older woman, or black Hispanic male.
I see no way to keep your client out of jail."
"Please, kind Sir," said Santa, "I'd like a chance to speak.
I do not think ‘tis fair that you call me a freak.
Most kids have gone so far to calling me a saint,
But even I admit that that's a bit too quaint."
"Truth is I'm not more than a poor delivery man,
Trying to bring joy where ere I always can.
Through sleet and snow and slush and rain,
Not once have I been heard complain."
"But if it please the court, I swear
I'll change my ways, though it's unfair.
I promise to be lawful, knock on every door,
Won't slide down the chimney or land upon the floor."
"I won't kiss the Missus, just shake her hand instead.
Little kids can stand and I'll pat them on the head.
The cookies and eggnog, I'll leave for other guests.
My elves will work in shifts, with many, many rests.
"As for my hiring habits, tell you what I'll do.
I'll hire a Cuban black and a Catholic and Jew.
The deer will go to pasture; I'll put away the sleigh,
Deliv'ry in corporate trucks will route me on my way.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jul 2014
About this poem:
I enjoyed the fact I could write such a funny poem
I will stay same
Once upon a time all,I do have fallen by blink....
I was so pimply looks,she all cute one all think.
But i was all by fear,as she loves to stare me....
And one she also fallen,although by to know us as we.
But as most of tale have,each one have thin ears....
And one day she left all,no glimpse of,passed years.
For will she stay same,Greeted smiles,in my weeps.
And fate make us meet again,Only wish such i do keep....
I was so pimply looks,she all cute one all think.
But i was all by fear,as she loves to stare me....
And one she also fallen,although by to know us as we.
But as most of tale have,each one have thin ears....
And one day she left all,no glimpse of,passed years.
For will she stay same,Greeted smiles,in my weeps.
And fate make us meet again,Only wish such i do keep....
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: May 2014
About this poem:
This poem is written for the one,who can make me smile,when ever she like to have from me.
Schönste Gefühl (Most Beautiful Feeling)
Es ist ein seltsames Gefühl habe ich
es kommt und geht in mir
kein Name davor erscheint
wie es in der Nacht versteckt
es ist nicht vom Mondlicht beleuchtet
die Sonne bei Tag nicht seine Freundin
was ist das seltsame Gefühl?
Ich glaube nicht, meine Stimmung kenne mich
ob es bedeutet, Schäden oder gut
Nur der Himmel weiß, das Geheimnis
und dann von dort eine Stimme
sagte mir klar und deutlich:
dieses seltsame Gefühl ist die Liebe
das ist, warum Sie so frieren
ein weiteres Mal, wenn Sie so heiß fühlen
die Sterne im Himmel jubeln
zu wissen, dass Sie diese Gabe haben
und Ihre Augen geben ihm Leben
das Mondlicht und die Sonne
Herold seine Offenbarung wie
eine Blume blüht im Licht
jetzt, dass seine bekannte, sag mir,
Was ist dieses Gefühl aufgerufen wird?
Es ist ein vertrautes Gefühl der Tat
für diejenigen, die einen Komfort verloren
und Liebhaber überall
es ist das schönste Gefühl
um unter dem Himmel zu entdecken
ein seltsames Gefühl, einen Namen gegeben,
ist wirklich ein unvergesslicher Anblick
dass der Name für die kommenden Zeiten
wird unter dem blauen Himmel
und den Engeln und den Menschen bekannt sein
von den höchsten Höhen auf die Erde
ist die Liebe in die Seelen der Menschen
und landet die Sonne und die Sterne.
There is a strange feeling I have
it comes and goes within me
no name appears in front of it
as it were hidden in the night
its not illuminated by moonlight
the sun by day is not its friend
what is this strange feeling?
I do not know myself my mood
whether it means harm or good
only heaven knows the secret
and then a voice from there
said to me loud and clear:
this strange feeling is love
that's why you feel so cold
another time you feel so hot
the stars in heaven rejoice
to know you have this gift
and your eyes give it life
the moonlight and the sun
herald its revelation like
a flower blooming in the light
now that its known, tell me
what this feeling is called?
Its a familiar feeling indeed
to those who are lost a comfort
and to lovers everywhere
its the most beautiful feeling
to discover under heaven
a strange feeling given a name
is truly a sight to behold
that name for the ages to come
will under the blue sky
be known both to angels and mankind
from the loftiest heights to the earth
is the love in men's souls
and that alights the sun and the stars.
es kommt und geht in mir
kein Name davor erscheint
wie es in der Nacht versteckt
es ist nicht vom Mondlicht beleuchtet
die Sonne bei Tag nicht seine Freundin
was ist das seltsame Gefühl?
Ich glaube nicht, meine Stimmung kenne mich
ob es bedeutet, Schäden oder gut
Nur der Himmel weiß, das Geheimnis
und dann von dort eine Stimme
sagte mir klar und deutlich:
dieses seltsame Gefühl ist die Liebe
das ist, warum Sie so frieren
ein weiteres Mal, wenn Sie so heiß fühlen
die Sterne im Himmel jubeln
zu wissen, dass Sie diese Gabe haben
und Ihre Augen geben ihm Leben
das Mondlicht und die Sonne
Herold seine Offenbarung wie
eine Blume blüht im Licht
jetzt, dass seine bekannte, sag mir,
Was ist dieses Gefühl aufgerufen wird?
Es ist ein vertrautes Gefühl der Tat
für diejenigen, die einen Komfort verloren
und Liebhaber überall
es ist das schönste Gefühl
um unter dem Himmel zu entdecken
ein seltsames Gefühl, einen Namen gegeben,
ist wirklich ein unvergesslicher Anblick
dass der Name für die kommenden Zeiten
wird unter dem blauen Himmel
und den Engeln und den Menschen bekannt sein
von den höchsten Höhen auf die Erde
ist die Liebe in die Seelen der Menschen
und landet die Sonne und die Sterne.
There is a strange feeling I have
it comes and goes within me
no name appears in front of it
as it were hidden in the night
its not illuminated by moonlight
the sun by day is not its friend
what is this strange feeling?
I do not know myself my mood
whether it means harm or good
only heaven knows the secret
and then a voice from there
said to me loud and clear:
this strange feeling is love
that's why you feel so cold
another time you feel so hot
the stars in heaven rejoice
to know you have this gift
and your eyes give it life
the moonlight and the sun
herald its revelation like
a flower blooming in the light
now that its known, tell me
what this feeling is called?
Its a familiar feeling indeed
to those who are lost a comfort
and to lovers everywhere
its the most beautiful feeling
to discover under heaven
a strange feeling given a name
is truly a sight to behold
that name for the ages to come
will under the blue sky
be known both to angels and mankind
from the loftiest heights to the earth
is the love in men's souls
and that alights the sun and the stars.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jan 2015
Post Comment
Still Free to a Good Home
Looking for happiness, looking for love,
Looking for someone with help from above,
Seeking a partner who's loving and kind,
Seeking that someone to be on my mind.
Where are those people who just have it all,
That know how to party and just have a ball?
The people who have that most wonderful way,
Who can make you feel happy and brighten your day.
I'm looking for someone to love and admire
To share all life's pleasures and set me afire.
Where have they gone to, where can they be?
Perhaps they're not looking for someone like Me!
Looking for someone with help from above,
Seeking a partner who's loving and kind,
Seeking that someone to be on my mind.
Where are those people who just have it all,
That know how to party and just have a ball?
The people who have that most wonderful way,
Who can make you feel happy and brighten your day.
I'm looking for someone to love and admire
To share all life's pleasures and set me afire.
Where have they gone to, where can they be?
Perhaps they're not looking for someone like Me!
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jan 2015
About this poem:
It's about me of course!!!
I do believe
I do believe the Lord above created you for me to love, I think that he knew best because he made you better then all the rest.I has a hea et n it was true but now it's gone from me to you, so take good care as I have done for you have two n I have none,if I should die and go up there, I'll wait for you at the golden stairs, if your not there bye judgment day I'll know you went the other way, I'd give those angels back there wings golden hearts n all those thing things to prove my love for you is true joleene I'd search the fires of hell for you
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Sep 2014
About this poem:
Just a poem about my go I lost in a wreckIch bin ganz zufrieden (I am quite happy)
Ich sehe das Meer
Ich freue mich auf den Mond
um mich herum
ist dunkel und still
Nur ruhig
mein Herz weiß
ist in dem Tempo
meiner ruhigen Atem
Ich lebe in einer Welt,
wo keine Blätter
rascheln im Wind
doch für das Leben von mir
Ich kann das Meer nicht sehen
aus meinen eigenen Platz -
im fernen Dunkelheit
erscheinen die Berge
Brüten in Geheimnis
wie mein Leben unerkennbar
so meine Hoffnung, der Liebe
noch, kann Ich mich nicht beklagen
da jeden Tag
Ich bin ganz zufrieden
mit dem, was lieben Gott
hat mich gesegnet.
I see the sea
I look at the moon
all around me
is dark and still
the only calm
my heart knows
is in the pace
of my quiet breath
I live in a world
where no leaves
rustle in the wind
yet for the life of me
I cannot see the sea
from my own place -
in far-off darkness
appear the mountains
brooding in mystery
like my life unknowable
as my hope of love
still, I don't complain
since every day
I am quite happy
with what Dear God
has blessed me.
Ich freue mich auf den Mond
um mich herum
ist dunkel und still
Nur ruhig
mein Herz weiß
ist in dem Tempo
meiner ruhigen Atem
Ich lebe in einer Welt,
wo keine Blätter
rascheln im Wind
doch für das Leben von mir
Ich kann das Meer nicht sehen
aus meinen eigenen Platz -
im fernen Dunkelheit
erscheinen die Berge
Brüten in Geheimnis
wie mein Leben unerkennbar
so meine Hoffnung, der Liebe
noch, kann Ich mich nicht beklagen
da jeden Tag
Ich bin ganz zufrieden
mit dem, was lieben Gott
hat mich gesegnet.
I see the sea
I look at the moon
all around me
is dark and still
the only calm
my heart knows
is in the pace
of my quiet breath
I live in a world
where no leaves
rustle in the wind
yet for the life of me
I cannot see the sea
from my own place -
in far-off darkness
appear the mountains
brooding in mystery
like my life unknowable
as my hope of love
still, I don't complain
since every day
I am quite happy
with what Dear God
has blessed me.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Dec 2014
About this poem:
I wrote the poem to say that what I lack is not as important as my serenity and everything I'm blessed with.So many people complain and are resentful and I am grateful for what I do have and I learned how to give thanks for it.
Life can be lonely but even then I look forward to every day and appreciate being happy is all I need most in life.
Give My Regards.. Verse 1
She took my virginity
I smoked my first blunt with her
She let me love her and I swore I wouldn't quit her but...
sometimes a promise is made to be broken
when I left-between us, no words were spoken
tears ran down her cheek
I wiped them with my finger
kissed her on the lips and said
"I wish I could bring you"
we went through alot
beef with knuckleheads and chicken heads
when I came home late, she was there on the bed
there to hold my head over the sink after too many drinks
looking at her with pink eyes
she made things better in a wink
we made wished on stars, had water fights in the summer
we held each other tight when on cloudy days-it thundered
I left my heart with you so until we're reunited
you;re the inspiration for this song and how I write it
I smoked my first blunt with her
She let me love her and I swore I wouldn't quit her but...
sometimes a promise is made to be broken
when I left-between us, no words were spoken
tears ran down her cheek
I wiped them with my finger
kissed her on the lips and said
"I wish I could bring you"
we went through alot
beef with knuckleheads and chicken heads
when I came home late, she was there on the bed
there to hold my head over the sink after too many drinks
looking at her with pink eyes
she made things better in a wink
we made wished on stars, had water fights in the summer
we held each other tight when on cloudy days-it thundered
I left my heart with you so until we're reunited
you;re the inspiration for this song and how I write it
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jan 2013
About this poem:
I wrote this many years ago when I was an aspiring emcee.. I now recite it as a spoken word piece. It is dedicated to Brooklyn, after I moved to the Bronx for a while
The Illinois Hillbillies
Let me tell you all a story about a man named Todd
The poor salesman barely kept his cats fed
Then one day he was playin the lottery
When up from the computer came the winning numbers
300 million that is
150 million if you take it as one lump payment
Next thing you know old Todd's a millionaire
Kinfolk said, "Todd! Move away from there!"
They said Illinois is the place you outta be
So he loaded up his crap and he moved to Illinois
Cub fans that is, Bear fans too
The Illinois Hillbillies
The poor salesman barely kept his cats fed
Then one day he was playin the lottery
When up from the computer came the winning numbers
300 million that is
150 million if you take it as one lump payment
Next thing you know old Todd's a millionaire
Kinfolk said, "Todd! Move away from there!"
They said Illinois is the place you outta be
So he loaded up his crap and he moved to Illinois
Cub fans that is, Bear fans too
The Illinois Hillbillies
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jan 2013
About this poem:
Parody of the Beverly Hillbillies. I have a friend who is always talking about winning the lottery. In this country it has become a kind of religion. I mostly despise gambling, preying on the dumb and uneducated. It does give people hope and it surpasses all other forms of entertainment in this country combined.
Fiegn'n to love
It's like being in a room and no one else is there
Straight glued to a zone and got no reason to fear
So filled wit bubbles inside and wanna let them go
Use to put on the girls in the past but they just couldn't understand it
I'm fiegn'n to, fiegn'n to love somebody
If you are the right one to receive it
Then I am the right man to give it to ya
I'm fiegn'n to roc wit cha and love your body
Say the word girl and u will get it
I'm willin to hit u off......................................
Straight glued to a zone and got no reason to fear
So filled wit bubbles inside and wanna let them go
Use to put on the girls in the past but they just couldn't understand it
I'm fiegn'n to, fiegn'n to love somebody
If you are the right one to receive it
Then I am the right man to give it to ya
I'm fiegn'n to roc wit cha and love your body
Say the word girl and u will get it
I'm willin to hit u off......................................
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Dec 2012
About this poem:
Love is its essence. The desire to lavish someone with the power of love has a life of its own.. The feelings that follow such desire are expressive, felt in the inner parts of a being with the ability to empower another, forming a bond.Poems entered on these pages are copyrighted by the authors who entered them. They cannot be reproduced without the author's written consent. © Copyright 2001-2024. All rights reserved.
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