Comedy Blogs (1,863)

Funnies

I hate when old people poke you at a wedding and say "you're next". So next time I was at a funeral I poked them and said "you're next". I think the worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades. I'm not as think as you drunk I

Light hearted lunch break :-)

Little Johnny's Homework Excuse

When little Johnny was in the fifth grade he looked downcast, so his teacher asked, "What's the problem, Johnny, I hope it's not homework again"? "Well, uh, yes it is", replied Johnny. "I was stupid and made my homework paper into a paper airplane

Origins of the office Stapler Part 1

THE STAPLER IN THE CAVEMAN DAYS In the caveman days, staplers were free, they roamed the plains of the Serengeti to the highlands of the Alaskan Alps, living in small family groups they became fastidious in their methods of hunting prey, however inb

MOHAMAD THE SKATEBOARDER

I COULD WATCH THIS ALL DAY ! This "story" is only 5 seconds. Caution, do not click the start button while sipping your coffee. MOHAMAD THE SKATEBOARDER Praise Allah! https://gfycat.com/PlaintiveObedientFlounde

blogging in the good old days !

I imagine it was like this http://www.youtube.com/v/wOQeqcPocsQ?version=3&start=952&end=1015&autoplay=0&hl=en_US&rel=0

Raw Toast

I have just discovered that I have been eating raw toast my entire life! I visited some friends in the big city and they had a machine called a "toaster", they simply put 2 slices of raw toast in and within a few minutes it "pop-up" and there befo

Husband and Wife

A husband and wife were driving through Louisiana. As they approached Natchitoches, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town. They argued back and forth, then they stopped for lunch. At the counter, the husband asked the waitress, "Be

Shopping Trolleys (Carts) are alive...be careful

I had been worried, no one seems to care about the plight of shopping trolleys, so I decided to investigate and what I found shocked me. I parked my van in a supermarket car park near to closing time with a hamper of food and a flask of coffee to

DANGEROUS PLACE

Its very dengerous tobe in Blog city these days. Trools and Goblins walk the streets And not too long ago some wanted to set up a Hihgt Court in Blog City.. Be careful of what you say here or one could get lynch before the hight cou

Ole and Lars

Ole and Lars are walking down a street in Minocqua WI, when they see a sign on a store that reads, "suits $5.00 each, shirts $2.00 each, and trousers $2.50 per pair.Ole says to his pal Lars, "Looky here! We could buy a whole gob of dese, take 'em ba

OK People.

So I want to update my profile picture. I want it to say come get me girls I'm available. Please Help me by posting a photo of a pose you would like me to try emulate . Here's my choice, But please feel free to give me your own Ideas.

Outdoorsy Man

During his physical, the doctor asked the patient about his daily activity level. He described a typical day this way: “Well, yesterday afternoon, I waded along the edge of a lake, drank eight beers, escaped from wild dogs in the heavy brush, jump

:)

I have just one word for beautiful women with questionable morals, poor decision making skills, and a high sex drive . . . . . Hi

Eish....

Then there are those http://cdn.someecards.com/someecards/usercards/MjAxMS0wMjAxNzUyOTJhZjlkOTQx.pn

Afternoon Delight...

My favorite part of the day...reminds of those sweet moments when I feel complete in the arms of special someone. I know it's usually night time for most and morning time is good time for me too but afternoon is kinda special to me...aft

Wise Sayings

The idea is to die young as late as possible Don't worry about old age, it doesn't last that long. Every now and then I throw in one of those typos to see who's paying attention :-) Give me the grace to see a joke, to get some humor out of l

Do You ever

See a picture, and automatically think of a blogger

Maybe I just need a cup of coffee...or...

I was doing some " thinking"... What do you think ,do vampires dream... In the case of an apocalypse,I`d spend the first 20 minutes wondering why the Internet isn`t working... Do you think my neighbor would mind if I would name my new puppy af

Ecotarians

Ecoterians We have all heard of vegetarians and the more sinister vegans but there is a new group out there called Ecoterians. They will only eat recyclable materials, no animals or vegetables are consumed at all. Some examples:- The Martin f

dogs are not dumb

A Bit Of Humor

In a Catholic school cafeteria, a nun places a note in front of a pile of apples, "Only take one. God is watching." Further down the line is a pile of cookies. A little boy makes his own note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples." :rol

Husband vs. Wife

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcast

If we boycott certain bloggers...

..do you think they would disappear eventually ? ..me included...

Ginger nut

Being ginger is a bit like being a vampire. You can't go out in sun. You can't see yourself in a mirror, at least until you have painted on some features. Plus people

Cinco de Mayo! What is it really?

This "holiday has always bugged me. I am an American but the "day" still gets posed as questions to me as if I was born and educated in Mexico. So, I decided to look into history and find out about "Cinco de Mayo". To begin with, the real Mexic

R ants nutritious !

I had coffee a la ant this morning. We have an ant plaque at present as the rain is scarce so they come inside for water and food. I had ant traps out but their use by date seems to have come and gone. They climbed into the kettle and by the

do love a biker chic...

Hedge Hogs

Fable of the Hedgehog It was the coldest winter ever. Many animals died because of the cold. The Hedgehogs, realizing the situation, decided to group together to keep warm. This way they covered and protected themselves; but the quills of ea

Hundreds of innocent wooden chairs executed

Hundreds of innocent wooden chairs executed in the desert. Its been reported that the scattered remains of hundreds of chairs have been found in the arid desert near the small town of Harare. Evidence of ethnic cleansing by lay-z-boys and Laura A

Strange!

Uhmm... It has been so long I was too busy to log in here until today is a VERY HOT day in my city and the house has no electricity due to something has just broken somewhere and someone is fixing it!! It's difficult to sleep even midnight at aro

Happy birthday

Happy birthday to the blurred blogger, Mollybaby, have a fantabulous day and I hope you've taken it off work and are going to have a thoroughly awesome day :b

Blog VS Forums

I've been blogging here for years now and wasn't interested really in the forums. I read some posts there when I started blogging here, the nastiness put me off. It wasn't till few weeks ago when I decided to give it a try. I know some topics a

stolen cat...

For the lack of better blog subject matter, has anyone seen the movie Keanu....about a stolen cat trying to be retrieved? ....I seen previews to it, it seems like it would be a great comedy...seeing I am more of a cat person. B

oh well..I tried...

if you can make a woman laugh....

..with a little sauciness thrown in... ..youve done it boys..

Generations...feeling older? Maybe you fit in here

Any of this sound familiar? 1966: Long hair 2016: Longing for hair 1966: KEG 2016: EKG 1966: Acid rock 2016: Acid reflux 1966: Moving to California because it's cool 2016: Moving to Florida because it's warm 1966: Trying

Wanna Get A Ripped Body?

Methinks every guy should own one

"Town Of Ratwhiskers Plans Survey of Residents On

EXTRA! EXTRA! READ ALL ABOUT IT! THE OUTHOUSE TIMES-HERALD Dateline Ratwhiskers, Arkansas, June 16, 2020 Illgup Flylippe , Reporter. The small rural town of Ratwhiskers is considering hiring an independent patriotic firm to survey residents abo

Shopping Trolley Union

UOST (Union Of Shopping Trolleys) With British retailers now charging a staggering 5 pence per plastic shopping bag shoppers have begun to steal trolleys, this has prompted a new Union set up by the association of trolleys and carts. Membership h

PART TWO RATWHISKERS' SURVEY

PART TWO RATWHISKERS' SURVEY "Those KKK patriots are really a pro-cull advocacy group. Certainly, I felt, it needed to look fair; if you're going to do a survey that has the appearance of being credible, it needs to be done by a so called independ