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Last Viewed Comedy Blogs (1,864)

Here is a list of Comedy Blogs ordered by Last Viewed, posted by members. A Blog is a journal you may enter about your life, thoughts, interesting experiences, or lessons you've learned. Post an opinion, impart words of wisdom, or talk about something interesting in your day. Update your blog on a regular basis, or just whenever you have something to say. Creating a blog is a good way to share something of yourself with others. Reading blogs is a good way to learn more about others. Click here to post a blog.

Johnny_Sparton

Speechless

The Driver sitting there with Bert on a boring Tuesday night at the local bar. Of course the Driver is drinking soda, otherwise...how could he be the Driver?

Boring...

Boring...

Both the Driver and Bert are sitting at a small town bar on a Tuesday night. The Driver turns to Bert and says, "this sucks." Nobody was in the small town bar except those two and the bartender. The Driver with analyzing every damn thing...analyzes the situation. Bert, if we are going to be at a bar spending money on drinks, why don't we do it with some women around? Bert turns to him with a large grin on his face...speechless...

Let's go...south.

An hour later they are there.

Plenty of women here Bert...the Driver says.

After talking with many different ladies, the night ends.

Bert and The Driver are sitting there...she walks up...would you guys like to tip me for my dance. The Driver, "of course." ...grabs a dollar out....

The Driver in the next thing closest to love looking at this beauty has to ask..."what nationality are you?" I am Cuban and Hispanic, she replies. What are you? I am French and Canadian. She turns to Bert to ask him his nationality while she was only standing there with her sexy panties on....Bert was again, Speechless.

wave
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sdarlagg

This guy wants a second term as Potus.

God help us if he is elected to a second term. I hope everyone else in the blogs will stand up for the USA citizens' security, economy and freedoms come this November.

I hope the best for him in his private life but I cannot vote for this guy. Let someone else who understands the difference of missions for Ukraine and Gaza.....

Unbelievable this guy is the leader of the USA government: Biden announced that the United States is "providing airdrops of food and other supplies into Ukraine."

The White House immediately corrected Biden's announcement: "He meant Gaza."



(This blog is about no one else except Dementia Joe. All others will be towed away sooner or later.)
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Vierkaesehochonline today!

Here on the many thousand hectare Vierk estate.....

it's mid harvest time. As I look from the fourth story A/C widdow's watch roof tower, onto the verdant fields, Chardonnay in hand, viewing busy underpaid illegal immigrant farmworkers, many mere children, slaving away, most separated long ago from parents by our brilliant President Trump, my face beams with pride. All so happy to be serving the wealthy white man, knowing that the service is entirely at my pleasure, for at any moment, a call to the "Mica" will bring on the govenment goons to lock them into the back of their overcrowded dirty, stuffy lime green Chevy Suburbans, for that dreaded trip back over the rio Grande. Again in mi patria linda, no? My Spanish is good, but haven't yet found the equivalent to "Yassah Massah", for their proper address of me, but am working on it. There are various forms of rank social Darwinistic capitalism, but this example suits me just fine. Will get me a big black Victorian top hat, to wear while boot brushing the sweaty little brown beggging urchins to the sides of the road, as I walk among them. Ah, the good life, in the Donald's USA.
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Catfoot

Confucius Say...

Confucius was a Chinese wise man who lived from 551 to 479 BCE. He was a philosopher, teacher, politician, and editor.

Let's look at a few by Confucius today. There are hundreds of them and maybe you can add some; these are my favourites. Though I somehow do not believe he said any of these. grin He was a much deeper man.

Man who run in front of car get tired.
Man who run behind car get exhausted.
Man who drive like hell, bound to get there soon.
Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.
Man who sit on tack get the point!
Man who jump off cliff, jump to conclusion!
Man stuck in pantry have áss in jam.
Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day long.
Man who lay woman on ground, get piece on earth.
Man who snort coke, get bubbles up nose.
Man who have last laugh, not get joke.
Man who eat too many prunes, get good run for money.
Man with tool in woman's mouth not necessarily dentist.
Man who walk through door sideways going to Bangkok.
Man who pushes piano down mineshaft get tone of a flat miner.
Wise man never play leapfrog with unicorn.

Catfoot says: Confucius say too damn much.grin
cats meow cats meow

And to all my friends and everybody else:
Have a great day.
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Gentlejim

Wise Sayings

The idea is to die young as late as possible

Don't worry about old age, it doesn't last that long.

Every now and then I throw in one of those typos to see who's paying attention :-)

Give me the grace to see a joke, to get some humor out of life and smiling it on to other folk.

Have a great Day and Laugh, "Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many".

We try to bust a gut with our funny, Yo Mama, Redneck, lawyer, animal, relationship and crap jokes.

You only live once! So make sure you spend 15 hours on the internet everyday, seeking validation from strangers. thumbs up cheers
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Gentlejim

Thanks

I want to thank everyone who commented on my blog yesterday:

Name 5 cs bloggers you would want to be stranded on an island with?

I really enjoyed the interaction! It was fun! BTW, I still have some room left on my boat for anyone who wants to go to Palawan, Philippines with my group!rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing

Let's do this again!thumbs up
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chancer_returnsonline today!

Joe Bloggs

The original blogger rolling on the floor laughingrolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
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Oh no..I feel a vlog coming on..

This time it will be lips sync to music relating to individual bloggers..grin
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teenameena

French kiss...........

rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing ................................ ........ ........... .............If any man want to kiss you, i mean" French kiss".....if you do not want it...what would you say????.......i will say ...i like to eat garlic and onion firstrolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing dancing
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chatilliononline now!

Funny Johnny Carson's quips...

Two generations stayed up late watching Johnny Carson host of the Tonight Show.
I remember friends repeating some of the funny things he said. If you know the show, his side kick and co-host Ed McMahon would often lead Johnny into something funny.
For example:
Johnny would say "It was really hot today"
Ed would comment "How hot was it Johnny"
Carson would come back with "It was so hot, I saw a bird cooking a worm on the sidewalk"
Typically, there would be a rimshot from the band's drummer signifying a joke!

Some of the people he interviewed said funny things and they both would laugh to tears.
That's the way it was with Johnny.

There was a blooper when he interviewed the wife of famous pro-golfer Jack Nicklaus. He asked her if she did anything to give him good luck before an important match. She replied "I kiss his balls" Realizing what she had said, she corrected herself by saying "his golf balls" but that was too late as Johnny had the comeback "I bet that made his putter rise to the occasion" totally embarrassed, she left the stage.

I didn't get to see it, but another memorable moment was when Zsa Zsa Gabor was on the show. She was sitting in the chair with a cat on her lap. When she asked Johnny if he wanted to pet her p*ssy he said...


It was brought up years later by Jane Fonda.

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