Here is a list of Comedy Blogs ordered by Most Commented, posted by members. A Blog is a journal you may enter about your life, thoughts, interesting experiences, or lessons you've learned. Post an opinion, impart words of wisdom, or talk about something interesting in your day. Update your blog on a regular basis, or just whenever you have something to say. Creating a blog is a good way to share something of yourself with others. Reading blogs is a good way to learn more about others. Click here to post a blog.
I don't
Like this at any time,
As the big day is approaching I mean this
valentine I am no where near to recieve
atleast a small package of chocolates
neither a single red rose of a flower...
Ok atleast some one to promise me a sweet lie like to take me out on a date
that definately would give me hope and
I would gladly look forward to never disappoint and show up.
Though still fingers crossed I never know
Something might come up ..yes there is still time.
As the big day is approaching I mean this
valentine I am no where near to recieve
atleast a small package of chocolates
neither a single red rose of a flower...
Ok atleast some one to promise me a sweet lie like to take me out on a date
that definately would give me hope and
I would gladly look forward to never disappoint and show up.
Though still fingers crossed I never know
Something might come up ..yes there is still time.
Oh no..I feel a vlog coming on..
This time it will be lips sync to music relating to individual bloggers..
Riddle for Seniors
I know some of you are not considered seniors. Thought you might enjoy this any way.
Today's riddle for seniors... Here is the situation:
You are on a horse, galloping at a constant speed.
On your right side is a sharp drop-off.
On your left side is an elephant traveling at the same speed as you.
Directly in front of you is a galloping kangaroo and your horse is unable to overtake it.
Behind you is a lion running at the same speed as you and the kangaroo.
What must you do to get out of this highly dangerous situation?
See answer below ..............
Get off the merry-go-round and go home, you've had enough excitement for one day!
Today's riddle for seniors... Here is the situation:
You are on a horse, galloping at a constant speed.
On your right side is a sharp drop-off.
On your left side is an elephant traveling at the same speed as you.
Directly in front of you is a galloping kangaroo and your horse is unable to overtake it.
Behind you is a lion running at the same speed as you and the kangaroo.
What must you do to get out of this highly dangerous situation?
See answer below ..............
Get off the merry-go-round and go home, you've had enough excitement for one day!
Gosh, It just disappeared???
Where Are You Politically?
Church and politics. I avoid them both religiously. Unfortunately, I can no more separate myself from politics than humans can separate themselves from nature.
It's just not possible.
It's up to me to do what I can to find out what is really going on. The internet helps, but as you may have noticed, there is much untruth on the web.
I needed a simple device to help me orient myself in a confusing blizzard of contradictory information. Taking inspiration from modern physics, I sought clarity through higher dimensionality.
The traditional political spectrum is a one dimensional line, and apparently has had a "Left" and a "Right" since the French Revolution (Post-royalty, the conservative elements, clergy and surviving nobility, sat to the right of the President while the more reactionary citizens, you and me, sat to the left.
Here I drew the spectrum using contemporary terminology. I leave you to decide where along the line that you are proud to be.
If you grasp the 2 ends of the line and bend the line into a circle, you now have a two dimensional representation.
Now where are you proud to be?
If you look at politics in the west in general and the US in particular, the extreme left does not really exist anymore. It has been effectively lopped off thanks to the Cold War.
No such pruning has been done on the right, a circumstance that is most evident in the American 2-party system. Much to the dismay of the Republican party, there is only one place for the right wing nutters to go and that is the Republican party.
Even though I don't pay much attention, I still feel that I'm being bombarded with badness. Loss of freedoms, falling standard of living, enemies on all sides and within. It's like a combination of Joseph McCarthy and Weapons of Mass Destruction.
Church and politics. I avoid them both religiously. Unfortunately, I can no more separate myself from politics than humans can separate themselves from nature.
It's just not possible.
It's up to me to do what I can to find out what is really going on. The internet helps, but as you may have noticed, there is much untruth on the web.
I needed a simple device to help me orient myself in a confusing blizzard of contradictory information. Taking inspiration from modern physics, I sought clarity through higher dimensionality.
The traditional political spectrum is a one dimensional line, and apparently has had a "Left" and a "Right" since the French Revolution (Post-royalty, the conservative elements, clergy and surviving nobility, sat to the right of the President while the more reactionary citizens, you and me, sat to the left.
Here I drew the spectrum using contemporary terminology. I leave you to decide where along the line that you are proud to be.
If you grasp the 2 ends of the line and bend the line into a circle, you now have a two dimensional representation.
Now where are you proud to be?
If you look at politics in the west in general and the US in particular, the extreme left does not really exist anymore. It has been effectively lopped off thanks to the Cold War.
No such pruning has been done on the right, a circumstance that is most evident in the American 2-party system. Much to the dismay of the Republican party, there is only one place for the right wing nutters to go and that is the Republican party.
Even though I don't pay much attention, I still feel that I'm being bombarded with badness. Loss of freedoms, falling standard of living, enemies on all sides and within. It's like a combination of Joseph McCarthy and Weapons of Mass Destruction.
over 45? test your alertness
Fill in the missing letters to check your cognitive skills. People on CS do have a slight advantage because we are so us*d to working round miss*ng letters. Or is it an advantage?
1. _ _NDOM
2. F_ _K
3. P_N_S
4. PU_S_
5. S_X
6. BOO_S
I'll post the answers later on if there's any interest
1. _ _NDOM
2. F_ _K
3. P_N_S
4. PU_S_
5. S_X
6. BOO_S
I'll post the answers later on if there's any interest
What If Noah Tried To Build The Ark Today
…..And the Lord spoke to Noah and said:
“In one year, I am going to make it rain and cover the whole earth with water until all flesh is destroyed, but I want you to save the righteous people and two of every kind of living thing on earth. Therefore, I am commanding you to build an Ark.”
In a flash of lightning God delivered the specifications for an Ark. In fear and trembling, Noah took the plans and agreed to build the ark.
Remember,” said the Lord: “You must complete the Ark and bring everything aboard in one year.”
Exactly one year later, fierce storm clouds covered the earth and all the seas of the earth went into a tumult. The Lord saw that Noah was sitting in his front yard weeping.
“Noah,” he shouted…“Where is the Ark?”
“Lord, please forgive me,” cried Noah. “I did my best, but there were big problems: First, I had to get a permit for construction, and your plans did not meet the building codes. I had to hire an engineering firm to redraw the plans”.
“Then I got into a fight with the Fire Marshall and OSHA over whether or not the Ark needed a sprinkler system and approved floatation devices. Then, my neighbor objected, claiming I was violating zoning ordinances by building the Ark in my front yard, so I had to get a variance from the local planning commission. Then, I had problems getting enough wood for the Ark because there was a ban on cutting trees to protect the Spotted Owl…but, I finally convinced the U. S. Forest Service that I really needed the wood to save the owls. However, the Fish and Wildlife Service won’t let me catch any owls, so, no owls.”
“Then the carpenters formed a union and went on strike. I had to negotiate a settlement with the National Labor Relations Board before anyone would pick up a saw or hammer. Now, I have 16 carpenters on the Ark, but still no owls. When I started rounding up the other animals, an animal rights group sued me. They objected to me taking only two of each kind aboard mumbling something about “Obama and fairness”".
“Just when I finally got the suit dismissed, the EPA notified me that I could not complete the Ark without filing an environmental impact statement on your proposed flood. They didn’t take very kindly to the idea that they had no jurisdiction over the conduct of the Creator of the Universe. Then, the Army Corps of Engineers demanded a map of the proposed new flood plain. So I sent them a globe”.
“Right now, I am trying to resolve a complaint filed with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission that I am practicing discrimination by not taking Godless, unbelieving people aboard. The IRS has seized my assets, claiming that I’m building the Ark in preparation to flee the country and not pay taxes. I then got a notice from a state revenue agent that I owe them some kind of user tax because I failed to register the Ark as a “recreational water craft.” And finally, the ACLU got the courts to issue an injunction against further construction of the Ark, saying that since God is flooding the earth, it’s a religious event, and, therefore, “unconstitutional”. I really don’t think I can finish the Ark for at least…another five or six years.”
Noah then waited for a response from the Lord…
The sky began to clear, the sun began to shine, and the seas began to calm. A rainbow arched across the sky. Noah looked up hopefully.
“You mean you’re not going to destroy the earth, Lord?”
“No,” He said sadly.”
“I don’t have to. The government already has.”
“In one year, I am going to make it rain and cover the whole earth with water until all flesh is destroyed, but I want you to save the righteous people and two of every kind of living thing on earth. Therefore, I am commanding you to build an Ark.”
In a flash of lightning God delivered the specifications for an Ark. In fear and trembling, Noah took the plans and agreed to build the ark.
Remember,” said the Lord: “You must complete the Ark and bring everything aboard in one year.”
Exactly one year later, fierce storm clouds covered the earth and all the seas of the earth went into a tumult. The Lord saw that Noah was sitting in his front yard weeping.
“Noah,” he shouted…“Where is the Ark?”
“Lord, please forgive me,” cried Noah. “I did my best, but there were big problems: First, I had to get a permit for construction, and your plans did not meet the building codes. I had to hire an engineering firm to redraw the plans”.
“Then I got into a fight with the Fire Marshall and OSHA over whether or not the Ark needed a sprinkler system and approved floatation devices. Then, my neighbor objected, claiming I was violating zoning ordinances by building the Ark in my front yard, so I had to get a variance from the local planning commission. Then, I had problems getting enough wood for the Ark because there was a ban on cutting trees to protect the Spotted Owl…but, I finally convinced the U. S. Forest Service that I really needed the wood to save the owls. However, the Fish and Wildlife Service won’t let me catch any owls, so, no owls.”
“Then the carpenters formed a union and went on strike. I had to negotiate a settlement with the National Labor Relations Board before anyone would pick up a saw or hammer. Now, I have 16 carpenters on the Ark, but still no owls. When I started rounding up the other animals, an animal rights group sued me. They objected to me taking only two of each kind aboard mumbling something about “Obama and fairness”".
“Just when I finally got the suit dismissed, the EPA notified me that I could not complete the Ark without filing an environmental impact statement on your proposed flood. They didn’t take very kindly to the idea that they had no jurisdiction over the conduct of the Creator of the Universe. Then, the Army Corps of Engineers demanded a map of the proposed new flood plain. So I sent them a globe”.
“Right now, I am trying to resolve a complaint filed with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission that I am practicing discrimination by not taking Godless, unbelieving people aboard. The IRS has seized my assets, claiming that I’m building the Ark in preparation to flee the country and not pay taxes. I then got a notice from a state revenue agent that I owe them some kind of user tax because I failed to register the Ark as a “recreational water craft.” And finally, the ACLU got the courts to issue an injunction against further construction of the Ark, saying that since God is flooding the earth, it’s a religious event, and, therefore, “unconstitutional”. I really don’t think I can finish the Ark for at least…another five or six years.”
Noah then waited for a response from the Lord…
The sky began to clear, the sun began to shine, and the seas began to calm. A rainbow arched across the sky. Noah looked up hopefully.
“You mean you’re not going to destroy the earth, Lord?”
“No,” He said sadly.”
“I don’t have to. The government already has.”
MY HEART GOES BOOM BOOM BOOM
I just received this lovely message from a hunky gentleman...I'm wondering how many ladies here have received the clone of this too?
Hi
I deeply regret that it is my unfortunate duty to bring it to your attention that you are above and beyond our maximum standards for looks. You are clearly a 9/10 and here on connectig singles we only allow 6/10 maximum . Your account will indefinitely closed if you failed to tell me your name , e mail address , your favorite color and mostly a little more about yourself . I found you attractive , just wanna know you more .
Really made my day here...
Hi
I deeply regret that it is my unfortunate duty to bring it to your attention that you are above and beyond our maximum standards for looks. You are clearly a 9/10 and here on connectig singles we only allow 6/10 maximum . Your account will indefinitely closed if you failed to tell me your name , e mail address , your favorite color and mostly a little more about yourself . I found you attractive , just wanna know you more .
Really made my day here...
online today!
French kiss...........
................................ ........ ........... .............If any man want to kiss you, i mean" French kiss".....if you do not want it...what would you say????.......i will say ...i like to eat garlic and onion first 
if you can make a woman laugh....
..with a little sauciness thrown in...
..youve done it boys..
A Blog is a journal you may enter about your life, your thoughts, interesting experiences, or lessons you have learned. It's your own page on Connecting Singles that you can update on a regular basis, or just whenever you have something to say. You can write about an opinion, impart words of wisdom, or talk about something interesting in your day. Creating a blog is a good way to share something of yourself with Connecting Singles members. Reading blogs is a good way to learn more about members you have met here. Please be sure to read the blog rules before posting.
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