Here is a list of Humor Poems ordered by Most Liked, posted by members. Read poetry, post your own poems or comments. Poems on these pages are copyrighted © by the authors who entered them. Click here to post a poem.
No More Sad Poems
A millionaire is not going to give me money
To brighten up my life
And make all my days be sunny
The rich have jets and yachts
They don't want sad poems that might spoil their day
Smart people got what they got
And dumb guys write sad poems anyway
No more sad poems
They are just a waste of time
And after all I'm not sad enough
To turn to a life of crime
MY NEW GARDEN
No matter how tired, I was game to play
Blisters on my fingers and palms
Still I toiled without any qualms
The rewards you see were plenty
Sitting at times reading quietly
First weeks the shoots appeared
Then birds flew in as I'd feared
I had planted enough for them and me
My crops were pollinated by the bees
The birds swooped in, creating a din
Fighting, pecking each other, twas a sin
The greed I had never seen before
They were so full they couldn't fly anymore
But I'd put a net over my crop
The birds were full of seeds I'd dropped
I'd won for now and await the growth
The birds can have some there's enough for both
About this poem:
Observations making my new garden grow for birds and ME
13/26
13/26
About this poem:
Competition, who can write the longest sequence of rhyme using only one entry per time per letter in the alphabet. e.g. collide and cried is not allowed, just use one. I got through 13/26 letters in this one. Wonder if at, bat, cat could go more? Over to you if you can beat 13..
THE PERSIAN PETARD
“a small one if possible please”
A young man with keys escorted me up
a couple of flights selected a door and went in
He told me the price and concealing my shock
I decided on saving my face
by requesting ‘a smaller one still’
Off we went up and selected another
He ushered me in and asked me if this one would do
I said that it would and holding my breath
I asked him the price
“The same as the other” he pleasantly said
I swallowed my pride laboriously squeezing out the words
“and cheaper?” to which he replied “Certainly: this one, sir.”
Later viewing all from my lofty vista I reflected on
'the humiliation of the hoisted’.
THE SECOND THOUGHT
It’s a terrible waste of time:
lying there twiddling my eyebrows
or dreaming up words that might rhyme.
Why don’t I chant a ‘te deum’
or swear repenting remorse
or scream for succour or sanctum
or plead for a stay of sentence?
Perhaps the postman’s at the door
or my dead wife came back again
or once more it’s the brink of war
or women have turned into men.
It’s a BORE. I don’t even care
if I’ve seen my very last dawn!
WAIT: a decisive idea !!!
I'll get up and yawn my head off!
Our World
Contains Quinine
pleasant kind of sour
quells the muscle spasms
in the midnight hour
..well my Mum swears by it and she's 84
worked for me last night..
hold up I'm here for a poem:
Letter to Castro
24 February 1962
Dear Comandante
Death to the imperialists
death to all capitalist counter revolutionaries
death to the gringos
and their failed attempt on your shores
trust not Khrushchev
may you continue to be
hung like a horse
in your green fatigues
and carry the beard
of the mercenary
may the sisters
continue to fall for you
may sugar rise
send more cigars
Viva la revolución
Che
About this poem:
Tonic water and CubaWORDPLAY
I awaken
I'm alive
If I never wake up again
I'm dead - which however
I cannot experience
I think this is unfair
and to offer Death
its fair share of existence
I now rename ‘Life’
‘Death’
At last I can enjoy
the 'un-happenable'
(I often wondered
what it would be like!)
Mountain full of Gold
About this poem:
Is a music like I toke as a poemPoems entered on these pages are copyrighted by the authors who entered them. They cannot be reproduced without the author's written consent. © Copyright 2001-2024. All rights reserved.
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