The Name of the Muse
Have you consulted your muse lately? I always figured mine had to be slightly crazy, that is the only explanation for some of my poems.
TENNIS ANYONE
There used to be a girl at tennis who always put the second tennis ball down her front whilst serving, not seen so much these days as modern girls tend to tuck the second ball into their pants!
More Jokes
Q: How do you stop a lawyer from drowning? A: Shoot him before he hits the water. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Q: Why have scientists started using lawyers for experiments instead of rats? A: They don't become so attached to the lawyers.
Country song
Just a song...Lol..A couple things do fit at the moment tho haha...
Special offer on me. . .
try the salesman pitch just roughly not well thought out
Larry
I am often in cemeteries for extra curricular reasons and there is a raccoon that lives in a one that I am often at and now feed so I thought of a day and a life for this raccoon. we named Larry, just because Thats Larry and Harry lives in the tomb above where I believe the raccoon lives too
Easter
frivolous taken on the bunny etc
7 DAY FORECAST
A TYPICAL WEEK IN MY LIFE!
The Old Hag
The great Old Hag Wedding...I'll be best man! lol.
Entrapment
It's that time of the month, When all things in their Natural balance, are disturbed And nothing you can do can Will appease her, if she gets The wrong reaction. NO, NO, NO! Not that TIME OF THE MONTH; When you walk a thin line for only day
hedi's past
best job I ever had (can I please be age 20 again?)
The tale of an Insomniac
I lie awake most every night Trying to sleep is my only plight Staring at the ceiling, laid in my bed Many thought run through my head So to my GP my symptom I described Sleeping tablets the doctor prescribed No longer worrying about staying
your touch
hehehehe oh come on now you didn't know i was just a lamp
up rooted
ok well the boy didn't actually pull all the trees out of the ground he is old enough to call a tree removal company and have them pull all the trees out of the ground while mommy was to busy being mommy to the milk man while daddy was on vacation and no I do not have a little boy or not even a little girl. this is just a poem. lol
A message to Plucky ( Dark Horse)
Ladies and Gentlemen , friends and poets please do not watch the horrific videos below if you have a weak or sensitive hearts and compassion for these kind quacking animals unless your Plucky or Liam than I am laughing in a very sinister laugh. I have posted videos of Pluckys demise and of his twin brothers. http://youtu.be/jAyFxY4Ntxw http://youtu.be/0xzRKjAiWpY http://youtu.be/Yp6dDXTVDkA
billy done run wild
soomebody stop me...
'Getting Married'
Never say Never
a love match
it's all in the racket and how it swings ;-)
If Violets were Red
I've always pondered the great mysteries - one of which is: "if violets were red, and roses blue"
Recipe for heartache
Mnnn...tasty
"Merry Christmas to all"
Happiness overflows on this wonderful day!
fright night.
oh you know you hear about the horrors of being married.lol. this poem came from me being married for real that wasn't a good marriage. being single afterwards haven a dream that you were still married.
Sleepless
A sleepless night Spent struggling Through the meanders of my mind In endless explorations. Innumerable considerations Scattered around As stars in the sky None with enough light Of its own But adaptable In their interconnection To show
Then God Said
I figure if God creates everything, then everything has to be created by him, kind of like Genesis continued.
chocoholic ........SG's challenge
roast almond chocolate is pretty damn fine but then again the ferrero range is simply divine belgian chockies bring me smile so does cadbury's homely old style anything with nuts and raisins too or maybe caremello is chocolate true t
Nursery Rhymes For Twisted People
If you read this you are obviously twisted
I am coming back !!!
I am back and just thought of this right now ! Really really miss you guys !! and my females fans !! no kisses and hugs ...a blank cheque will do !
Little Red Riding Hood
Ingredients : - 1 oz gin - 3/4 oz creme de mure - 3/4 oz wild strawberry liqueur - 1 1/2 oz orange juice Use a "Shaker" for Little Red Riding Hood drink recipe Shake and strain into a double-cocktail glass filled with crushed ice. Garnish with berries, a short straw, and serve. Serve in "Cocktail Glass" This drink is described as:- Vivid summery fruit flavours make a cocktail that tastes as innocent as Grandma, but has a bite more reminiscent of the Wolf.
santas bad day
just another bit of fun, i wrote this down based on a little joke my sister made some time ago, i quite enjoy doing poems when i can think of something that might be funny too,
Kickit
A new game of kickit as described in the International Rules For Kickit.
Coffee and Poetry
Reposting this as I have collaborated with an English Prof in CA and this version is worth posting again! Here's to all the coffee drinkers!
Robin Williams
Just missing Robin Williams and all the new comedy he could have made in the future, there is certainly plenty of good work to choose from. He is definitely one of the best funny men of our times.
This Is More Fun To Do Than Watching Soccer
I have watched about 20 seconds of the world soccer so far. All I know is the game is being played in Brazil and the US is out.
Pretty Happy
I'm bored.
HIGH NOON SAGA challenge
what I started with INDIAN AND COWBOY Jesse continue it with HIGH NOON so if anyone wants to try and continue with the flow of this funny poetry please come aboard it has to follow with the names and their casting. . me - red Indian Jesse -
Verbosity
A bard I've always wished to be for words they always cherish me and bring to all a great delight when read with relish and foresight or glanced on briefly in despair or intoned softly at the fair or shouted to the world with glee in shades of
If I were a furniture
My funny take on inanimate objects around our homes... If they could talk... What would they be saying or thinking???? The mind boggles!
David Letterman
Stephen Colbert is taking over some time later this year.
fishin' lines
anybody got a hook?
money
i wrote this poem because a email i got here a doctor she said in her words a shrink why am i wasting my time writing blogs a bunch of other stuff true love isn't for sale it just pissed me off so i wrote a poem called money hope you like this one my true honey love you baby
redex made me do this, and I'm no gentleman
save that cork, I may need it...