Here is a list of Humor Poems. Read poetry, post your own poems or comments. Poems on these pages are copyrighted © by the authors who entered them. Click here to post a poem.
Sing along
The gnomes they're in their gnomey homes
the elves have ceased to ring
there's nothing on the radio
the kids have taken wing
Santa is a long way off
Easter Bunny's done his thing
the TV's one big disaster zone
so we just have to sing
"There's a lull in the poetry
ring-a-ding-a-ling
there's four hundred little poetry scribes
and we haven't seen a thing, Woah!"
Turning up the music now
so I can do the fling
the neighbour thinks I've lost the plot
I'm dancing in my bling
we have to get more poetry
who wants to be the King
without a little poetry
we'll just have to sing
"There's a lull in the poetry
ring-a-ding-a-ling
there's four hundred little poetry scribes
and we haven't seen a thing, Woah!"
the elves have ceased to ring
there's nothing on the radio
the kids have taken wing
Santa is a long way off
Easter Bunny's done his thing
the TV's one big disaster zone
so we just have to sing
"There's a lull in the poetry
ring-a-ding-a-ling
there's four hundred little poetry scribes
and we haven't seen a thing, Woah!"
Turning up the music now
so I can do the fling
the neighbour thinks I've lost the plot
I'm dancing in my bling
we have to get more poetry
who wants to be the King
without a little poetry
we'll just have to sing
"There's a lull in the poetry
ring-a-ding-a-ling
there's four hundred little poetry scribes
and we haven't seen a thing, Woah!"
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Aug 2021
About this poem:
la la la la la
bark
bark ,bark ,bark,bark
hey you stop that yap
bark,bark,bark,bark
now right cut that crap
bark,bark,bark,bark
you know i can see you
bark,bark,bark,bark
right now i'm getting a shoe
bark,bark,bark,bark
my god will it never end
bark,bark,bark,bark
before it send's me right round the bend
bark,bark,bark,bark
hey are you nearly done
bark ,bark,bark,bark
right now you had better run.
hey you stop that yap
bark,bark,bark,bark
now right cut that crap
bark,bark,bark,bark
you know i can see you
bark,bark,bark,bark
right now i'm getting a shoe
bark,bark,bark,bark
my god will it never end
bark,bark,bark,bark
before it send's me right round the bend
bark,bark,bark,bark
hey are you nearly done
bark ,bark,bark,bark
right now you had better run.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jul 2021
About this poem:
nog was my wifes pet he died one week after herand he did just this.
he loved to bark at the postie and delivery guys.
miss the little shit.
the dog
mumble, mumble, mumble , phew
looks like the poodle done a poo
scrapers, wipes and sprays too
now your off to have a spew
your turning green and going to chuck
while that damm dog runs amuck
who is to blame you ask all's there
looking around with their hands in the air
bloody dog you say must go
but the floor is all clean no spots dp show
he he comes for a pat
maybe time to by that mat.
looks like the poodle done a poo
scrapers, wipes and sprays too
now your off to have a spew
your turning green and going to chuck
while that damm dog runs amuck
who is to blame you ask all's there
looking around with their hands in the air
bloody dog you say must go
but the floor is all clean no spots dp show
he he comes for a pat
maybe time to by that mat.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jul 2021
About this poem:
yes bored and yet more flows out.
Smile
Smile it's sunrise this is our moment our surprise no one can rob us even in disguise....
So smile now smile maybe it's been a while I know it's a lot maybe it's all gone to pot....
but smile throughout the badness the sadness and blues and put on them new shoes.....
there's no need to hurry laughter comes while you rest be at peace at least for now....
And live life's moments with a glow it truly is your greatest show...
these words I speak are from my heart and I hope it helps someone to come out from the dark.....
p.s climb a tree and sit there for a while who knows it might make you SMILE :)
So smile now smile maybe it's been a while I know it's a lot maybe it's all gone to pot....
but smile throughout the badness the sadness and blues and put on them new shoes.....
there's no need to hurry laughter comes while you rest be at peace at least for now....
And live life's moments with a glow it truly is your greatest show...
these words I speak are from my heart and I hope it helps someone to come out from the dark.....
p.s climb a tree and sit there for a while who knows it might make you SMILE :)
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jul 2021
About this poem:
smileThe angel in my beer
There's a little angel in my beer glass
he appears there when I'm down to the last drops
I'm not sure if he's thirsty or not
he just sits there humming
so I refill the glass
then I miss him so I have to drink that one
and there he is again whistling
I whistle too
but he laughs at my effort
being sensitive to criticism
I refill again
and drink more slowly
this time he appears grumpy
so I turn the glass over on the bar
and invite 3 people over to watch him dance
he just gives us the one finger salute
never trust a drinking angel
he appears there when I'm down to the last drops
I'm not sure if he's thirsty or not
he just sits there humming
so I refill the glass
then I miss him so I have to drink that one
and there he is again whistling
I whistle too
but he laughs at my effort
being sensitive to criticism
I refill again
and drink more slowly
this time he appears grumpy
so I turn the glass over on the bar
and invite 3 people over to watch him dance
he just gives us the one finger salute
never trust a drinking angel
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jul 2021
About this poem:
there's an angel in my beerPuzzle
A man has to take a wolf, a goat and a cabbage across a river.
His rowing boat has only enough room for the man plus either the wolf, the goat , or the cabbage. If he takes the cabbage the wolf will eat the goat. If he takes the wolf the goat will eat the cabbage. Only when the man is present are the goat and cabbage safe.
Question: Relate the situation to Afghanistan and comment on the US withdrawal?
haha
ok then how does he get them all across safely?
His rowing boat has only enough room for the man plus either the wolf, the goat , or the cabbage. If he takes the cabbage the wolf will eat the goat. If he takes the wolf the goat will eat the cabbage. Only when the man is present are the goat and cabbage safe.
Question: Relate the situation to Afghanistan and comment on the US withdrawal?
haha
ok then how does he get them all across safely?
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jul 2021
About this poem:
Puzzle time
Elmo’s AWOLNATION Sail Parody
TALE !
This how Elmo spends his day.
I love to squish my Playdoh clay.
Blame on Elmo’s A,B,C’s babeh.
My father spends his time on stocks.
But Elmo loves to play with blocks.
Blame on Elmo’s A,B,C’s babeh.
TALE !
TALE !
TALE !
TALE !
TALE !
My parents call my playpen jail.
And tantrums give my Momma hell.
Blame on Elmo’s A,B,C’s babeh.
Teacher, calls me “special needs”
Cuz Elmo’s hyper active seed.
Blame on Elmo’s A,B,C’s babeh.
TALE !
TALE !
TALE !
TALE !
TALE !
Ma ma ma ma ma
Ma ma ma ma ma no!
Ma ma ma ma ma,
Ma ma ma ma ma no!
Ma ma ma ma ma,
Ma ma ma ma ma,
TALE !
TALE !
TALE !
TALE !
TALE !
Once upon a time, a fairy
TALE !
Once upon a time, a fairy
TALE !
Once upon a time, a fairy
TALE !
Once upon a
TALE !
© July 30, 2014, L. Karriem
This how Elmo spends his day.
I love to squish my Playdoh clay.
Blame on Elmo’s A,B,C’s babeh.
My father spends his time on stocks.
But Elmo loves to play with blocks.
Blame on Elmo’s A,B,C’s babeh.
TALE !
TALE !
TALE !
TALE !
TALE !
My parents call my playpen jail.
And tantrums give my Momma hell.
Blame on Elmo’s A,B,C’s babeh.
Teacher, calls me “special needs”
Cuz Elmo’s hyper active seed.
Blame on Elmo’s A,B,C’s babeh.
TALE !
TALE !
TALE !
TALE !
TALE !
Ma ma ma ma ma
Ma ma ma ma ma no!
Ma ma ma ma ma,
Ma ma ma ma ma no!
Ma ma ma ma ma,
Ma ma ma ma ma,
TALE !
TALE !
TALE !
TALE !
TALE !
Once upon a time, a fairy
TALE !
Once upon a time, a fairy
TALE !
Once upon a time, a fairy
TALE !
Once upon a
TALE !
© July 30, 2014, L. Karriem
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jul 2021
About this poem:
Sometimes when I hear certain songs, jokes pop up in my mind making fun of it.This is the only parody I have copyrighted. I really need to get out a few of the
other ones that I wrote. I love writing parodies.
Ocean’s haiku challenge-2
Lifted by a breeze
Dreams transform into clouds
Sparkling drops return
No air left to breathe
Flowing sky following you
Vacuum for me
Locked in the closet
The skeleton felt confined
Those dirty secrets
The night was dragging
Nightmares kept coming back
Rooster did not care
Dreams transform into clouds
Sparkling drops return
No air left to breathe
Flowing sky following you
Vacuum for me
Locked in the closet
The skeleton felt confined
Those dirty secrets
The night was dragging
Nightmares kept coming back
Rooster did not care
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jun 2021
About this poem:
Another try..Cluedo
Reverend Green
vented his spleen
when little Miss Scarlett
called Miss Peach a harlot
and honorable Colonel Mustard
was left in the custard
when slinky Madame Rose
in black pantyhose
led Sergeant Grey
more than astray
but while they're all on the run
twas Peacock and Plum
who in the depth of the night
killed Mrs White
vented his spleen
when little Miss Scarlett
called Miss Peach a harlot
and honorable Colonel Mustard
was left in the custard
when slinky Madame Rose
in black pantyhose
led Sergeant Grey
more than astray
but while they're all on the run
twas Peacock and Plum
who in the depth of the night
killed Mrs White
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jun 2021
About this poem:
Running through the characters for funHaiku challenge
Trying on a mask
A familiar stranger
Stares back at me
A squeaking sound
My shoes travel where they want
Get to follow them
Eruption in space
Into a new dimension
The wave of love spreads
A familiar stranger
Stares back at me
A squeaking sound
My shoes travel where they want
Get to follow them
Eruption in space
Into a new dimension
The wave of love spreads
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jun 2021
About this poem:
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