Most Commented Humor Poems (1,868)

yet more amusing unamusing musing

Pink piqued me....(I tried to credit the Bard in the author spot, but for some reason it won't appear aside mine at the top...oh well)

Easter

When Jesus woke up from dead Why rabbit laid a chocolate egg?

I've hurt my knee

Just a little micky take out of men, sorry guys, I have some women ones too .

My Dog Rover 2

Now surely you remember my dog Rover The one who spoke so very well This time he taught me to play 'roll over' But now a sad tale I have to tell Of how this clever dog left me There was a day the government came We need your dog far across the

GUILTY?!

Guilty? Don’t sweat it. Its nothing to loose sleep over. Your not to bad. Their are alot of people in the same boat, irregardless of what you may think. Just get ahold of you’reself, take a few mental notes, and move on from here. http://www.care2.com/greenliving/8-spelling-mistakes-even-smart-people-make.html

Forever Bell

it's almost Friday?

Bus, Plane, Train and Automobile

Heading home and stopped for milk But then temptation grabbed me Stopped at shop to look at wine Sign said clearance items here At five dollars a bottle We're getting rid of these label wines To replace them with our own There was sparkling st

Just one of those days ;)

always upbeat and positive ... except for today !

I Am So In Love With You (rewrite of Poetnumber1)

A collaboration between Poetnumber1 and myself. He provided the original poem 'I Am So In Love With You' to which I added my twist. Poetnumber1 and myself hope you all enjoy this read.

Hi

hi

Last night I dreamed that I died!

did u know that "AWARE" rhymes with 'UN-FAIR

i like the fact that hermit crabs come into a poetry room merely to make everyone AWARE that there is a woman, alone but who claims not to be lonely....bull! you may know her by her obviating, oblivious and obscure comments she feels compelled to leave for less than mdiocre poets. Then again, the night life in midwest Florida i'm certain is filled with poetic type people, beginning with you, if i ever see another poem of yours posted yet! (IF I AM THINKING OF YOU, NO MATTER HOW OVERWHELMINGLY HURTFUL THOSE THOUGHTS ARE, IT STILL MEANS I'M THINKING OF YOU...read any of my e-mails but for the one you could use as ammunition

Greeny Queeny- a...lovestory... (Part 2)

Please note that shortly after the Queens demise her successors re-instated the rules and regulations laid down in the ‘Book of Brand-New Laws’, but that they replaced the prescribed jail-terms with a hunting-tax, since this proved to be more profitable- the dungeons underneath the royal castle having long since been converted to archival stores for the tax office. Licenses for hunting mythical creatures are obtainable from the ministry for war (and for the sinister!) for a modest fee. Provided you survive the battle with the red-tape… Oh- and please do not inundate me with letters of protest; I assure you that no mythical creatures were harmed in the making of this poem. Any complaints should be filed with the ‘Department for the protection of mythical creatures’ and will be processed (in due time, of course) by the highly efficient staff there (for a modest fee, of course…) Thank you for reading this poem- Have a nice century! (The Author) (PS: You should try reading part 1 first... It makes sooo much more sense...)

Greeny Queeny- a...lovestory... (Part 1)

Sir Rambeaux was one of these men: No brain to speak of- which was then no hindrance if one was a knight- for all one had to do was fight. But fights- they were short in supply: To get one, one had to apply by letter to the Minister for war (.

wandering man limerick

There was a young man who just wandered and all of his wealth he just squandered bereft of the companions and pleasure and far from his life of pure leisure to work on a farm which did him no harm If eating with hogs is measure at last he di

murphys troubles

The policeman asked murphy "What's afoot?" as murphy lay nearby. "as a rule it is 12 inches and on that you can rely." "Are you trying to be funny" he said in much disdain and muttered quietly within "this ones going to be a pain." "So wh

To 'Beard' or not to 'Beard' ?

It's getting warmer so it may come off, maybe.

WINE

I wrote this poem one evening while drinking wine (waiting on some divine intervention to help me with a book I was writing)...It was just for fun....

Greenfingers

Years and years ago I nearly got eaten alive by someone when I stood on his Golf-Course-quality lawn where each and every bit of grass was exactly one-and-three-quarter inches (measured with callipers, of course!) He very... err... politely... explained that he and his wife had spent months on their knees getting rid of the weeds and daisies in their garden. So I decided to immortalise him...

eskimos kiss

why do eskimos kiss with the nose dont they know how much they miss what a waste of lips by those ice cold tips dont they know how much kissing they miss on cold winter nights on cold winter days when snuggled up warm warm and tight w

~Valoosified~

what can you come up with for a meaning to this word. A bit a fun in here:)

The Limerick Challenge

My jean's are tight My top is low and all about is quivering it's friday night, the lights are low so when are you delivering ...........

and another......

ooooooops!......lol.....Andrew....xxx

Encouragement

Following the suit, of limericks, coming down like a rainfall.

A young lady from Spoad

lol.....Ribitt....Ribitt.....Andrew...xxx

IN CONFUSION

from dreamweaver the poems....just for a laugh.....Andrew....xxx

Thanksgiving Night

Yawwwwn....

Are We There Yet?

LOL I was laughing the hole time while I was thinking of what to write. Hope you all find it to be as funny as I did. :D

Gimme a Shot

Blatantly pandering to prospective employers... :D

Inscrutable!

Little things.......LOL.......Andrew.....xxx

Yankee Doodle

A conglomeration of several I have known...

Tragic Anachronism

Imagine how it would have been If when we met was 1810? Our letters taking months at sea And written with a crowquill pen. Our love would blossom sure and strong And we'd know we couldn't carry on Without each other in our arms And so we'd mov

Eat more Salmon Haiku

Inspired by Rob's tribute to fish. And reminded of the Pork farmer's motto: "Eat more Pork, the other white meat".

Election Day

Tomorrow is election day around here and I'm so tired of the campaign ads I could just scream!

domestic bliss part 2

When mary on the next day saw the mess she made she murmured once again you see as in the bed he laid his knee was very swollen and bruised and marked so red paddy had the luxury of languishing in bed She realized her temper had partly on

You Show Me Yours!

Wow, so thats yours?, what can it do?,,,,it does everything, want me to demonstrate for you?, Yes, I'd love to see it do its thing, jeez its big, bet it can damm near sing, Just hold out your hand, have no fear, just hold it like that and press

Total Rubbish!

Look, did ya not read the title,,,,I warned ya!

My Diagnosis!

Comprehending limitations causing spatial delay, creates corrective corrosponding conditional decay, administering adaptive medication during play, will intensify conditions showing limited replay, progressive alterations to the chemical make

Rain Rain

Bloody hell, its raining again, I'm swimming in liquid H20,,,,,,dont you know, If I pray dear Lord, will you take it away just give me a minute, while I think what to say, Dear Lord, I know your short staffed, and I have a daughter, she'll

I Wanna Do That!

"Hey baby,, I got a new book,,come over here and take a look",,, So I wandered on over,, like I was in clover,,,peaceful and happy,,, till she said make it snappy,,,,, she opened a page,,,just where she sat,,, pointed to it and said,,,"I wanna

The Teacher Learneth!

Dont be optimistic, dont be glad, dont be happy, be bloody sad, try it for a day and see how it sucks you'll be glad to change back,,I bet a 100 bucks, stick it out come what may, you'll be a better man after that day, complain and show distain